Spring Cleaning

It’s the little things that matter, isn’t it?! I tackled my much-neglected refrigerator shelves last night at 2 a.m. (don’t ask) and felt the most amazing feeling of “aaahhhh”. Can you believe I could get such a sense of accomplishment, renewal and energy just by ridding the shelves of crusty old ketchup and ages-ago spills? There are several reasons, I think, that this kind of clean out helped me feel so much better. See if any of these ring true for you. For one thing, this task has such a great, visible payoff; I can instantly see the result of my work. Also, I could start and complete the job in one fell swoop. Finally, there is the joy of getting this “to do” off of my list after weeks of telling myself, “you really should clean that”. Rarely do I get to have these same results as a parent. The results of our hard work will not show up for years to come, maybe never, but we still keep working. We still read to our children daily in hopes of opening new worlds to them, building brain connections, etc. Each day we try to feed them healthful foods so that their little bodies will eventually grow big and strong. We model, daily, how to be a loving, compassionate person so that they too will make a positive contribution to our world. But parenting is not something that we mark off our list after it is “complete”. This job is ongoing and sometimes the fruits of our labor are so subtle and so far in the distant future that we get a bit weary. Imagine our wonderful God who “parents” all of us at our various stages of development (or stagnation in some cases). I am so grateful He does not grow weary of me!

After having such a wonderful feeling of satisfaction after my foray into the land of muck and mire that is my refrigerator, I decided to apply this same diligence to another area of my life. I have begun to feel a little stale in my worship practices; how could I get the same feelings of renewal and energy injected into my time with God that I received by cleaning my fridge? Well, I decided to do away with the old way I would “squeeze in” time with my Lord. Since becoming a parent, I find that the only time I spend peacefully talking to our Savior is at the end of the long exhausting day. And then, I rush through my prayers or Bible reading so that I can collapse into bed. I decided to begin my day with God rather than waiting until all I had left to give Him were the scraps of energy that I had left. What a difference! By just waking up 15 minutes earlier (5 am now instead of 5:15!) I am able to read my verse for the day, pick out one part that “speaks” to me, breathe deeply and listen for God’s voice and assurance of love. So far, this “cleaning out and making new” process has given me even more satisfaction that my sparkly fridge. You could try this, too! Pick one of your spiritual practices and start anew. Maybe you’ll change the way you say prayers with your child at night or have the dinner prayer a little differently. Try it and let me know how you feel. It may even help for you to tackle your fridge first like I did; it couldn’t hurt, right?

Blessings,
Dr. Paula

The Present of Presence

During this season of Lent, we are being asked to commit to be present in worship as often as we can. By “present” our leaders don’t just mean that we show up and sit in our usual pew and “tune in” and out as the service progresses. In order to be fully present, we must fight down the urge to make a grocery list, a worry list or a honey-do list while we listen to the beautiful music and guiding words surrounding us.

I find that this process of being fully present enriches not only my worship time, but any time I am in relationship with those around me. If I attune completely to the activity at hand, be it play time with Stanton or John Davis or talking to my husband about his day, then I’m able to enjoy it, to more fully appreciate that time much more. It takes such discipline to do this on a regular basis in a world that applauds multi-tasking and “busyness” much more than calm and intentional “being”.

Challenge yourself during this season of Lent leading to Easter to truly BE in the moments that make up your days. While talking with your child, stop all other activity when you can. Look into his eyes and listen not only to the words, but to the emotion behind the words. Examine her face as she plays beside you. Notice the way he picks up apple slices and tucks them into his little mouth. Whatever it takes to slow you down so that you can have a deeper awareness, do it. This will be one of the hardest things you do this week, this month, this lifetime, but it will enrich all of your experiences beyond measure. God is able to work amazing miracles in souls that are still enough to listen and obey. The first most difficult step, however, is to make the commitment to be fully present in all of your relationships. Begin with the most important relationship of all: your time with God. Commit to just “being” as you experience God’s voice, God’s peace, God’s love. Next, I suggest you attend one of the services during Holy Week at First Church and remind your brain to stop and be present for what you experience during that time. The task is difficult and lengthy; the rewards are eternal.

Reason to celebrate!

Who hasn’t had a bout with the blues this year?! With the stock market debacle, post-holiday let down, and the cloudy, chilly days of winter around us, we may find staying cheerful is an uphill battle. However, each and every day can bring new joys and exciting discoveries if we remember to focus on them. I find that those mornings that I begin my day with a litany of “I’ve gotta do….today,” or “oh, man, how am I going to cope with … again?” that my whole day is inundated with the negative and woefully lacking anything positive and encouraging. However, if I do remember to begin my morning (before I even lift my head from the pillow) with a “thank you, God for ….” then my entire day is full of light and seems to run much more smoothly. If I continue to look for reasons to be thankful or things that make me laugh throughout the day, then they are easy to find. Those things we seek are multiplied I find. Here are a few tips to get each and every day started in the right direction:

• Before your feet hit the floor, say one ‘thank you prayer’. Pick anything: family health, your child’s sense of humor, or the fact you’re still needed and then let God know you’re aware of this blessing and are truly grateful.

• Decide whose you are and what your “grand purpose” is today. Say, out loud, “I am God’s precious child and I choose to be a loving presence today” is a good one for me. Saying this out loud can completely convince me and remind me that whatever other purposes or roles that I play during the day, I am still God’s child and am His loving ambassador truly helps me.

• Eliminate the “have to’s” and “should” from your vocabulary. Remembering that you really do have a choice in many of the chores and tasks you set out for yourself is truly liberating and uplifting. You would like to unload the dishwasher or choose to do a load of laundry today is much better than letting these tasks become burdens.

• Remember that you are your child’s best “joy model”. Do you really want to raise a curmudgeon? Wouldn’t it be great to model for your child someone who marches through life happily and gratefully accepting all the challenges and opportunities facing you knowing that God marches with you to lift your spirit and provide all you will need? Of course!

Blessings to each of you and your families,

Dr. Paula