More often than not

I recently was invited to teach the Genesis class about raising Calm and Compassionate children. I think I learned more than they did, however! We discussed some of the techniquest we parents can use to help our children grow into the kind of Christian who can be strong and steadfast in their faith even in the midst of a chaotic world. The importance of rituals and routines help build a sense of security and structure for children, which naturally leads to a calmer child, cannot be overstressed. Children love to know that certain things in their ever-changing world will always be the same. Mommy will always read stories to me at night, Daddy will always say prayers before supper, our family will always celebrate even small accomplishments each week. We know these routines are beneficial for our children and for us, but what about the times that the schedule is thrown off or we "blow it" and act in a way that doesn't help our child feel secure? What then?

The first thing to remember is that parenting is an imperfect art because human beings are completely fallable. There will be times that we lose our cool, act impatiently toward our children or fail to show compassion as we should. God's grace is amazingly abundant for all of us, including parents who are genuinely working as hard as they can to do what's best each and every day for their children. I want the message for all of us, children and parents alike, to be that we can be forgiven and strive to do better the next time. Each and every interaction you have with your child will make some sort of impact: negative or positive. If you can honestly say that more often than not you act and react calmly with your child, redirect in a way that teaches and builds rather than tears down, and provide a "safe haven" for your child to grow and learn "more often than not" then feel assured that you are on the right track. It's so important that we model what we would like for our children to become, but that includes asking for forgiveness when we do make mistakes. When we are impatient or terse with our children, we can ask for a redo. Let your child know that your response wasn't what you wanted it to be and ask if you can rewind the clock and do it again the right way. Evaluate on a daily or weekly basis your interactions with those children in your life. Ask, "Did I act in a way that demonstrates my love and care for my child? Are our routines creating a calm environment? Are there some "trigger" situations that I need to change? We're all on a path of becoming that is fortunately full of forgiveness and grace, but only if we do our part to be the children God created us to be "more often than not." Blessings on those of you who care for children in your home or in your heart.

Guardians of the Light

I recently read that parents can be described as "guardians of the light" and loved the image it created in my mind. It's so true that our children are full of God's light when they arrive, and that one of our responsibilities while they are in our care is to guard that light, that magical sense of wonder and love that comes with them from "God's factory". When they are babies, this is a fairly easy job because they're in our care almost around the clock. We can look into their little eyes and just see that spark! Guarding the light at this stage means responding to the little "coo's and goo's" with a loving, gentle voice, stroking their skin softly and providing for all their needs. As our little ones leave our arms, however, guarding their sense of wonder, awe and joy can be more daunting. There is much darkness out in our world and so we guardians must constantly turn our children toward the ultimate light: Jesus' love. On a daily basis, this means choosing love, turning toward the good in all things, remembering to be grateful, and caring for those who need it most. Such an important and worthwhile task, this job of guarding the light. Fortunately, we are not alone. Asking, sincerely asking, for God's help each and every morning is the first thing we guardians should do. The light that shines in our children can glow brighter with each passing season if we ourselves rely on the true source of all light, all wonder, all joy. Look at those little lights you have been given and help them shine on!